As a welcome to 2014, the latest in the line of Railex Filing folk tales is an altogether more swashbuckling affair! This time, we find ourselves in more exotic surroundings, hopefully providing a tropical antidote to our current winter conditions!
Long John Silver was anxiously pacing the Captain’s quarters. His hostile takeover bid – some might say mutiny – had gone according to plan, but in all the consequent chaos, the treasure map had disappeared. He proceeded to frantically search for it amongst the carnage.
What was the point in commandeering a ship if he had no means of finding the beloved booty? He rifled through the ship’s files for the umpteenth time, before pulling them out randomly and throwing them on the creaking cabin floor.
Silver’s natural resolve was waning; he could not find the document he wanted. The slapdash selection of files hung in tatters, a sorry looking mess with no discernible order to it at all.
It was then that his faithful parrot, Cap’n Flint, flew in with the missing manuscript in his beak: it was the map!
‘Cap’n Flint, you little beauty!’ cried Silver, his demeanour changing from annoyance to one of victory. ‘How in name of Davy Jones’ Locker did you find it?’
Dropping the scroll into his hands, the bird flapped over to a cord hanging from the ceiling and tugged vigorously. To Silver’s amazement, a panel in the wall opened to reveal an immaculate Railex filing system. ‘Railex, Railex!’ squawked the parrot.
Two weeks had passed, and the ship dropped anchor at the island. Silver clambered eagerly into his landing craft, greedy for the precious plunder. He rowed ashore and limped his way across the sand, excitedly unfolding the map as he went.
To his horror, the opened document revealed itself to be a HM Customs cash declaration form! He spun around to discover the ship sailing in the opposite direction. He was left stranded with a ‘C9011’ and no way of finding the lost loot.
It was then that he heard the faint, taunting sound of Cap’n Flint – still aboard the departing ship – ‘pieces of eight, pieces of eight, pieces of eight …’
Have a very happy and prosperous 2014, from all at Railex (Filing) Ltd!